So I did that Högskoleprovet thingy…
…and it honestly went pretty well. I even wrote a little blurb about it just a few days afterwards. I showed it to a few people, and a non-zero amount of them thought it was real, so I refrained from actually posting it. Hopefully it’s obvious why. 😅 1
So yeah, contrary to the fiction above, I had a surprisingly composed day. Apart from having to run to the train - it was a few minutes early and I thought I was about to miss it - everything went really well. I wasn’t stressed out, I didn’t feel overwhelmed, and not a single one of the questions caught me entirely off guard. I mean, the reading comprehension parts in Swedish are criminally boring and the use of maps and graphs from literally 1850 is at least a tiny bit academically rude, but I already knew that was going to be the case.
While they did release both the questions and the answers publicly by now, I haven’t gone through them to approximate my score. We were not allowed to make notes of our answers2, so trying to guess the score would effectively mean doing like half of the test again. That doesn’t interest me, and honestly I’d rather just wait for the actual result when I get it on June 17th. I think I did pretty well, and I feel like speculating about the score is a bit of a waste of time and might even be a bit of a jinx.
And then what?
When I left my job in early March, I took a short break and went out in the woods for a bit. Then, I pretty much went into studying mode to prepare for the test. So, once the test was over, I went into kind of a vacation mode. No plan, no things to do, no need to work. Taking care of the apartment a bit, working out. Reading a bit. Thinking about things to write about in the future.
This is kind of why I was a bit “late” on my imagined monthly schedule of posting these updates. I’m not really doing anything worth talking about. I’m doing nothing, and it’s amazing for my soul. The feeling of not setting an alarm for the morning is fantastic; Just doing what my mind and my body needs, rather than forcing something else.
It’s a bit of a balance though - because the lack of routine can quite quickly translate into a sense of lacking purpose, whatever the hell purpose can mean. And don’t get me wrong - I have a vast collection of notes and ideas and projects that could probably keep me busy for months if not years on end. I just have a feeling that I’m not done resting up just yet. I know that I’ll be done at some point and that gauge will be full, I’m just not in a rush to get there. That would be kind of the opposite of the point, y’know?
What do I hope for in the next update?
I should know my score by then! After that, it’ll be one more month of waiting until I know if I make it into the university programs I’ve applied to!
Other than the score, I am not really sure of what’s to come. The light is at the end of the tunnel in terms of the pandemic, but I’m pretty sure thing won’t have changed that drastically in a month.
I do have a nice feeling for the summer though. Feels like something big - something good - is on the horizon. We’ll see. 😊 💜
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In retrospect, writing it probably postponed the posting of this update. I felt like I had written what I needed to write about it, and kind of felt done with the topic. ↩︎
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And this seems to have changed recently. Pretty much everyone remembers that they were allowed to do this when they did the test. Feel free to be the 23rd person to tell me that - one more time won’t hurt. 😎 ↩︎